Well, I leave for training on Saturday. Yes, THIS Saturday, as in, 4 days from now.
I don't really have anything all that fascinating to say. I just felt that the countdown being this close, I should post something. I will say that I wish I were able to excited about Saturday, as much as my teammates seem to be. I've been too overwhelmed with my apartment situation and fears about my inability to speak Russian and to be extroverted, especially in a new culture, to really remember how excited I was back in November.
But today was a good day. It was sunny and productive. And I found a new journal--I filled up my last one the other day. Perfect timing. Fresh journal for a new adventure. =) I think I'm going to learn a lot about what it takes to love and serve even when I don't feel like I can. I look forward to filling my journal with all of those things.
And now I should get to bed. Sleep is good--especially since I seem to be sick (or developing allergies?). If you could ask Dad about that, that'd be cool. :)
Thanks for joining me in this journey! =) It is almost here!
Monday, June 13, 2011
Friday, May 20, 2011
Lightbulb!
The countdown is at 29 days! (But I leave for training on Saturday the 18th, so technically for me, it's 28! days.) Meaning it's crunch time. Lots to do to prepare, like finding teaching materials, medical tests to complete, figuring out my wardrobe,... packing everything I need for a summer in one 50lb suitcase. I'm heading out to a state park for a weekend camping trip the first weekend of June for some reflective space. Oh, InterVarsity, thank you for instilling in me the desire for disciplines like ROS's! It's been too long since I've had some serious outdoor face time. I'm looking forward to it. I even bought a tent this week! A tent of my own! My dad should be so proud. :)
But enough stalling. The reason I'm writing is because I finally know where I'm going! For everyone who has asked me, So, where in Russia will you be? I finally have an answer for you! I will be teaching at a youth camp in Cherepovets. Now where in the heck in Cherepovets, you might be asking. Good question! It's here
It looks to be midway between St. Petersburg, Moscow, and Novgorod.
It's so nice to have a location to pin my brain on. I even have the school's website! To be able to visualize where I'll be spending 5 weeks of my life is such a relief. People have asked me or otherwise commented on how brave I am for hopping off to a foreign country without knowing exactly where I'll be. And it honestly wasn't a huge deal to me. Now, when my letter was for the Commonwealth of Independent States, that was a little more of a big deal. But once I talked to my director and he said, Russia or Northern Kazakhstan, that was good enough for me. But now I realize how glad I am to know where I'm going. I can look at the world map in the lobby at work now and be able to stare at where I'm going instead of the massive expanse that is Russia. It's good to be able to focus on something.
So I guess my blog title can't be Russia/Northern Kazakhstan anymore, now can it? I'll think of something witty later...
And as far as the title of this post is concerned, it really had nothing to do with this post, except that it's from the movie Despicable Me and the main character has a Russian accent. :)
But enough stalling. The reason I'm writing is because I finally know where I'm going! For everyone who has asked me, So, where in Russia will you be? I finally have an answer for you! I will be teaching at a youth camp in Cherepovets. Now where in the heck in Cherepovets, you might be asking. Good question! It's here
It looks to be midway between St. Petersburg, Moscow, and Novgorod.
It's so nice to have a location to pin my brain on. I even have the school's website! To be able to visualize where I'll be spending 5 weeks of my life is such a relief. People have asked me or otherwise commented on how brave I am for hopping off to a foreign country without knowing exactly where I'll be. And it honestly wasn't a huge deal to me. Now, when my letter was for the Commonwealth of Independent States, that was a little more of a big deal. But once I talked to my director and he said, Russia or Northern Kazakhstan, that was good enough for me. But now I realize how glad I am to know where I'm going. I can look at the world map in the lobby at work now and be able to stare at where I'm going instead of the massive expanse that is Russia. It's good to be able to focus on something.
So I guess my blog title can't be Russia/Northern Kazakhstan anymore, now can it? I'll think of something witty later...
And as far as the title of this post is concerned, it really had nothing to do with this post, except that it's from the movie Despicable Me and the main character has a Russian accent. :)
Friday, April 29, 2011
Tidbits!
50 days!!
I'm so excited. I turned in my questionnaire of self with lots of gory details about who I am so they can pair me with my teammate(s). Working on the visa application. Completed save for the stupid photos. Now if only my landlord would call me back to let me know if I have a place to live once I get back, that'd be great...
April is not even over yet, but HE has made good on his promises to provide! Just as he said he would. I don't want to quote anything until the transactions have come through, but...I am amazed at his faithfulness and his sufficiency. I knew he would come through for me, but this...I never thought it would be like this. Oh man, I'm going to Russia!!
Though I do have to comment: Out of all the places in the world, and out of all the random languages I know, I couldn't be sent to France? I can carry on a decent conversation en francais. en francais, нет росскй. *sigh* It'll be fun though. Another language! Wee!
I'm so excited. I turned in my questionnaire of self with lots of gory details about who I am so they can pair me with my teammate(s). Working on the visa application. Completed save for the stupid photos. Now if only my landlord would call me back to let me know if I have a place to live once I get back, that'd be great...
April is not even over yet, but HE has made good on his promises to provide! Just as he said he would. I don't want to quote anything until the transactions have come through, but...I am amazed at his faithfulness and his sufficiency. I knew he would come through for me, but this...I never thought it would be like this. Oh man, I'm going to Russia!!
Though I do have to comment: Out of all the places in the world, and out of all the random languages I know, I couldn't be sent to France? I can carry on a decent conversation en francais. en francais, нет росскй. *sigh* It'll be fun though. Another language! Wee!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Following
It's been a while. The countdown is at 80 days until I fly to LA for training. A week later, I will be overseas. Thought I'd give an update on how I'm doing...
It has been 7 months since I have left grad school. It has been 4 months since I have accepted the invitation to serve with Teach Overseas. My life in these past few months has been quite possibly the most challenging it has ever been (I've had darker, more trying years, but less challenging, if that makes sense), but I wouldn't trade a minute of it.
In this time, I have put my plans on pause. When I graduated college, I thought that I was going to spend the rest of my life holed away in my lab. I was going to spend my life reading, experimenting, and scribbling. In this time, I am coming to terms with the idea that that might not be my life. I am not concerned so much with leaving chemistry as what I'm leaving it for. I'm considering leaving it for things I had never imagined. Teaching. Advocating for students. Things I have dismissed as possible for little me. And now I find myself volunteering with InterVarsity and preparing to teach overseas. Both of these have been challenging in and of themselves. I have had to exercise my leadership muscles that I have hardly used, and I have had to let go of my pride and ask people to come alongside me for this journey, for both personal and practical support. Despite these challenges, I am certain of my place here and now. I'm just concerned about where it leads. I am concerned about where it leads because it does not lead back to the lab. I have no doubt that it will be a far better road, it's just scary. And I know it wouldn't require trust if it wasn't. It is with trust that I even step on the road to begin with.
Overall, I've been fairly overwhelmed. With hope, with excitement, with fear, with anticipation, with details, with thoughts. But I love my life right now. And I am grateful for every minute.
It has been 7 months since I have left grad school. It has been 4 months since I have accepted the invitation to serve with Teach Overseas. My life in these past few months has been quite possibly the most challenging it has ever been (I've had darker, more trying years, but less challenging, if that makes sense), but I wouldn't trade a minute of it.
In this time, I have put my plans on pause. When I graduated college, I thought that I was going to spend the rest of my life holed away in my lab. I was going to spend my life reading, experimenting, and scribbling. In this time, I am coming to terms with the idea that that might not be my life. I am not concerned so much with leaving chemistry as what I'm leaving it for. I'm considering leaving it for things I had never imagined. Teaching. Advocating for students. Things I have dismissed as possible for little me. And now I find myself volunteering with InterVarsity and preparing to teach overseas. Both of these have been challenging in and of themselves. I have had to exercise my leadership muscles that I have hardly used, and I have had to let go of my pride and ask people to come alongside me for this journey, for both personal and practical support. Despite these challenges, I am certain of my place here and now. I'm just concerned about where it leads. I am concerned about where it leads because it does not lead back to the lab. I have no doubt that it will be a far better road, it's just scary. And I know it wouldn't require trust if it wasn't. It is with trust that I even step on the road to begin with.
Overall, I've been fairly overwhelmed. With hope, with excitement, with fear, with anticipation, with details, with thoughts. But I love my life right now. And I am grateful for every minute.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Content
It's gonna be worth it, it's gonna be worth it all.
I'm listening to some International House of Prayer (IHOP) songs on youtube, and this is the refrain of one of them. And my immediate thought is this trip to Russia/Kazakhstan. (It helps that I just read half of my reader for my trip, but still.) It's far more exhausting than I realized to raise funds, I get to try to deal with details like visas and immunizations and finding miscellaneous teaching aides, and all I want is June to hurry up and get here. And I know that once I get there, I'm going to have new information and situations thrown at me left and right so fast I'll get dizzy. And frustrated. But I believe that it is going to be worth it all. There's this warm, cozy feeling I have that tickles my stomach and pulls at the corners of mouth, despite the fact that I know transplanting myself to literally to other side of the world is going to be far from cozy. I just know that it is going to be worth it all.
I'm listening to some International House of Prayer (IHOP) songs on youtube, and this is the refrain of one of them. And my immediate thought is this trip to Russia/Kazakhstan. (It helps that I just read half of my reader for my trip, but still.) It's far more exhausting than I realized to raise funds, I get to try to deal with details like visas and immunizations and finding miscellaneous teaching aides, and all I want is June to hurry up and get here. And I know that once I get there, I'm going to have new information and situations thrown at me left and right so fast I'll get dizzy. And frustrated. But I believe that it is going to be worth it all. There's this warm, cozy feeling I have that tickles my stomach and pulls at the corners of mouth, despite the fact that I know transplanting myself to literally to other side of the world is going to be far from cozy. I just know that it is going to be worth it all.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Romance and Fundraising
Come with me. Do you trust me? Do you believe that I am enough and that I am faithful?
As I prayed through the weeks leading up to the acceptance of my invitation to teach with Teach Overseas, this is was my resounding response. Though the Lord had been speaking that to me prior to this opportunity, every time I prayed about this trip, this is what drowned out my words.
And so I embarked on this adventure. This adventure that is so covered in his fingerprints that it left me speechless when I first tried to write my initial support letter. This adventure that I cannot camouflage as anything other than by, for, and about HIM. Being assured of this, I was not actively concerned about support-raising. Scared, most definitely. But not worried about this falling through in any way, shape, or form. I had expected to be thrilled as I walked with HIM in this; eager to discover his faithfulness. What I had not expected, however, was to be romanced by him.
This has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do, from stepping back from grad school to sending my family support letters. It requires me to be steadfast in my trust in HIM. It forces me to proclaim his Lordship over every aspect of my life. It has been something of a refining flame, bringing the impurities and areas of brokenness to the surface to be burned away. But he has been faithful to me in my times of angst and frustration, speaking words of encouragement over me through scripture, in prayer, through others. The beauty of knowing that I am at the center of HIS will for my life, seeing the road behind me and seeing the horizon just ahead knowing that HE has laid and walked every mile of it (even if I had taken a detour in the barren fields), is beyond comparison.
Two weeks or so ago, I got an email from a couple who are friends of mine and were potential donors. Our communication, on both ends, had been kind of spotty, leaving me feeling somewhat uneasy and guilty. I was out shopping, irritated that I could not find jeans in my size and that my dad was not calling me back about birthday plans for that evening, when my phone alerted me that I had an email from them. I was not in the mood to sort through fund-raising logistics at that moment in time, so I waited to read it until I got home. Wise choice. I logged into my email account to find a gentle reply that said that they wanted to support me financially with a gift that far exceeded what I had asked for. They noted that they “felt like the Lord was asking us to give this amount so He could encourage you that this trip is of Him and he wants you to go and trust Him.” I was floored. As if I had needed any more proof and encouragement! It was like He had shown up at my doorstep with flowers for no other reason than to see me smile. Like he had taken me out to my favorite restaurant for my birthday, but it wasn’t enough; he had to give me flowers the next day just so he could see me smile again. It took me until the next evening to find the right words to give back to Him, and even then, I had to repeat them because I couldn’t find any others.
This has always been about trusting HIM to lead, about discovering more of myself and discovering more of him. But I never thought it would be about love.
As I prayed through the weeks leading up to the acceptance of my invitation to teach with Teach Overseas, this is was my resounding response. Though the Lord had been speaking that to me prior to this opportunity, every time I prayed about this trip, this is what drowned out my words.
And so I embarked on this adventure. This adventure that is so covered in his fingerprints that it left me speechless when I first tried to write my initial support letter. This adventure that I cannot camouflage as anything other than by, for, and about HIM. Being assured of this, I was not actively concerned about support-raising. Scared, most definitely. But not worried about this falling through in any way, shape, or form. I had expected to be thrilled as I walked with HIM in this; eager to discover his faithfulness. What I had not expected, however, was to be romanced by him.
This has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do, from stepping back from grad school to sending my family support letters. It requires me to be steadfast in my trust in HIM. It forces me to proclaim his Lordship over every aspect of my life. It has been something of a refining flame, bringing the impurities and areas of brokenness to the surface to be burned away. But he has been faithful to me in my times of angst and frustration, speaking words of encouragement over me through scripture, in prayer, through others. The beauty of knowing that I am at the center of HIS will for my life, seeing the road behind me and seeing the horizon just ahead knowing that HE has laid and walked every mile of it (even if I had taken a detour in the barren fields), is beyond comparison.
Two weeks or so ago, I got an email from a couple who are friends of mine and were potential donors. Our communication, on both ends, had been kind of spotty, leaving me feeling somewhat uneasy and guilty. I was out shopping, irritated that I could not find jeans in my size and that my dad was not calling me back about birthday plans for that evening, when my phone alerted me that I had an email from them. I was not in the mood to sort through fund-raising logistics at that moment in time, so I waited to read it until I got home. Wise choice. I logged into my email account to find a gentle reply that said that they wanted to support me financially with a gift that far exceeded what I had asked for. They noted that they “felt like the Lord was asking us to give this amount so He could encourage you that this trip is of Him and he wants you to go and trust Him.” I was floored. As if I had needed any more proof and encouragement! It was like He had shown up at my doorstep with flowers for no other reason than to see me smile. Like he had taken me out to my favorite restaurant for my birthday, but it wasn’t enough; he had to give me flowers the next day just so he could see me smile again. It took me until the next evening to find the right words to give back to Him, and even then, I had to repeat them because I couldn’t find any others.
This has always been about trusting HIM to lead, about discovering more of myself and discovering more of him. But I never thought it would be about love.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)